I am not a huge fan of politics. But I am a huge fan of being able to do whatever the fuck I want. So I get extremely perturbed when a politician runs for office on a platform that limits people’s rights. This Sunday, I think we should all pray for Presedential Candidate Rick Santorum to go away.
I heard Ricky is pretty big on praying for stuff himself, so maybe it’s time we all took a cue from him and do some pretty serious prayer ourselves. Let us all pray that the man who is against Birth Control, Abortion, Same-Sex Marriage, and perhaps most importantly, PORN, will just disappear. Santorum literally said that if he was elected he would initiate a “War on Porn”. Sounds to me like somebody needs to get laid, by a super hot GUY. I have this one porno that I think he would actually love. It’s a three-way with two super busty nuns and a priest with a “gift from G-d” in his pants.
Maybe, Mr. Santorum, you just hate women or you don’t believe we are strong enough to make decisions on our own. Either way, I don’t like you, so move along and good luck at the pearly gates with your sweater vest on.
Oh! Also, let’s pray for Jennifer Garner this week because Ben Affleck has started smoking again and supposedly she’s super annoyed.