Ask Babe: Chic Booze?

Babe,

Now that it’s summer, I like to replace approximately 60 percent of my meals with alcohol. Partially because I think it’s insulting to wear a Missoni bikini when you’re flabby, and partially because it makes summer activities more interesting. So, what’s chic to drink?

S*******

 

Dear Betty Ford,

When it comes to alcohol, clear is always the way, though I will make an exception for champagne or a white wine on special occasions. Basically just stay away from brown liquor. It’s a nightmarish calorie fiesta that I want no part of. Drinking is the ultimate exercise in self-flagellation: So many carbs, so much sugar, all to feel kind of fucked up. I much prefer to smoke weed or do coke, just saying. Don’t tell anyone that.

LOVE YOU. MEAN IT.
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