Sometimes, no matter how badly you want it, it’s impossible to motivate yourself to work out. Maybe you’re too hungover. Maybe you’re too tired. Maybe you’re just a little bag of bones and getting out of bed might make you totally fall apart. Whatever the case, the fact is that if you can’t get your ass to your trainer, you’re not going to be burning any calories in the traditional sense of fitness. Whenever this unfortunate scenario happens to me, I like to do what I call “Mind Cardio.” It’s very simple: I watch motivational videos while laying in bed and doing bicep pulses with 2lb weights and pretending that I’m actually at the gym. Then I smoke five Marlboro Lights and don’t eat anything for the rest of the day. Works like a charm.
First up, there’s David Banner. I feel like he would make the best trainer. And everyone’s so sweaty in this video that it takes the pressure off of me to be sweaty. Love that.
Um, Ciara’s body is insane. I’ve actually worn a full length fur to the gym before. I burned 700 calories walking on a treadmill for 20 minutes at 3mph, incline level 12. So I like to watch this video and think about that day.
Kanye is one of the original thinspirational rappers. He gives a very positive message in this video, plus I die for an Anna Nicole Smith moment.