You’re A Babe (Pet Edition): The Madagascar Aye Aye

I guess I’m kind of pet-obsessed lately. Actually I’m always pet-obsessed. I’ve had 57 pets throughout my life. I can’t say that I’ve loved them all equally, but they do each represent a very specific time (or breakup), so for that I am grateful to them all. Pets are like boyfriends, if boyfriends were always drunk and couldn’t speak to you ever.

I wanted to make sure all of you know about this psycho little lemur thing that is becoming one of the most chic pet options in Spain right now. A friend from Barcelona just sent me one in the mail disguised as a pair Loub’s. When I opened the shoebox, there was a baby Aye Aye, just curled up peacefully in the corner, it’s two long fingers sprawled out in front of its little body. Maybe the worst gift I’ve ever received for no reason, I mean what am I supposed to do with that? So, I let him free in my backyard. He’ll be fine.

They come from Madagascar, which is somewhere, and they look like sickly, devil-worshipping monkeys from hell. But they make it cute. They are the PERFECT gift to give a boyfriend/girlfriend if you need them to break up with you. Sometimes you just need that out, and gifting this fucked up wingless bat will scare anyone away, pronto.

LOVE YOU. MEAN IT.
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  • Ali

    Gross.