Why do you never answer MY questions? Are you ignoring me? Or are you making up all the questions you do answer? I have my doubts.
Dear Doubty McDowderson,
I literally get thousands and thousands of emails from all of you psychos (not kidding). There’s no way I’d have the time or the energy to answer them all unless I was doing a ton of coke… all the time. Is that what you want from me? Are you trying to get me mildly addicted to coke again?
The reality is, I answer as many as I can and pick the ones that make sense to me. So maybe your emails have just been overlooked, or maybe your life is really boring. Anyway, now I’ve answered one of your emails. So stop screaming.