Once upon a time, there were two little girls named Paris and Nicole, and they were best friends.
They did everything together. Like drugs.
And shopping.
And more drugs.
And more drugs.
And reality shows.
Paris loved it.
But Nicole knew there had to be more to life than hanging out with cokeheads 24/7.
And it made her sad.
And mad.
So she lost a little weight and got a stylist.
And a DUI.
But eventually she became chic.
And then she had some kids.
And got her shit together.
Paris on the other hand, did not get a stylist.
But she did get engaged.
And then dumped.
Then she got a DUI.
And went to jail.
Then she was arrested in Vegas for cocaine possession.
And then she got a reality show.
But it was super dark. So it was cancelled.
And I guess now she’s a DJ?
Unclear.
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