Ask Babe: Blow

Babe,

Coke. How much is too much?

S********

 

Dear Lindsay Lohan,

Why don’t we answer this question by taking a little quiz?

 

1) Look in the mirror. What color is your skin?

a) Tan, duh! I fucking love being bronzed.

b) Pale but creamy. I hate the sun.

c) They don’t let me have mirrors here.

 

2) Now take a deep breath. How did that feel?

a) SO FUCKING ENERGIZING.

b) So fucking calming. Namaste.

c) I think I have pneumonia.

 

3) Who is your style icon?

a) Blake Lively, omg she is EVERYTHING.

b) Winona Ryder.

c) I don’t believe in clothes.

 

Okay we’re done.

You’re a total cokehead. That quiz was a test. If you have to ask, you’ve crossed the “too much” line, so step away from the mirrored tray, and put down the straw. Big kiss!

LOVE YOU. MEAN IT.
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