Ask Babe: Ummmmm?

Dear Babe,

It’s homecoming at my school and now is the time for all the totally cheesy guys to ask girls in semi-embarrassing yet kinda cute ways (like with banners and flowers and scavenger hunts and shit you get where I am going with this) and I am torn. Is homecoming chic or not? And what do I do if I feel like no one will ask me? Like what the fuck guys your asking your chem lab partners and not me? Like those girls wear sweat pants to school is this for real? PLEASE HELP guys don’t seem to get me? I love you and your book! Wish Roman could take me I’d die.

Love A***

And then she sent me this one:

Babe,

Please disregard the totally psycho-meltdown post I sent you concerning homecoming last night. Turns out I was like wayyyyy too sober this week and my super hot super tall guy friend asked me last night by decorating my room with pink balloons and Godiva. Love youuuuu please write another book.

Kisses xx,

A***

Dear Pink Lady,

Glad it worked out but your date sounds like he’s probably gay. Not that that’s a bad thing because it sounds like you’re kind of into that anyway. Try not to puke on your dress.