An Open Letter to Justin Bieber

Dear Biebs,

So your computer was supposedly stolen this past week and some random computer hacker/kidnapper threatened to release a ton of your private videos and whatnot unless you complied to their demands. Well surprise, surprise – it was a fake.

Please. Who was surprised by this? Who can go more than five minutes without looking at their Macbook Pro? No one under 25. So either you’re actually over 30, or this was some kind of publicity stunt.

Some part of me can’t help but think that if this was real, and all of your iMovie sex tapes were in the hands of a maniac, that this could have been a real opportunity for you. A way that people could take you more seriously. I mean, look what it did for Kim Kardashian. Think about it.

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