Sitting Down
There are things.
Things that simply cannot be done.
Things once done, unable to undo.
Fates have ways and the universe delivers.
Deliverance
Retribution
Decisions made in haste.
You will go to jail. You will fail. You are stale. Snail. Whale. Brail. Mail. Trail. Frail. Whoa, lot’s of words rhyme with jail.
My boyfriend, Frank didn’t deserve this.
Riri has never been more beautiful and you have never been more ugly.
Sit the fuck down, Chris Brown. Sit down.
In addition, I took the liberty to curate a list of potential guys Rihanna’s team should reach out to to replace CB…
Leonardo Dicaprio
Kanye West
Peter Dinklage (could be chic)
Josh Hartnett
Reggie Bush
Ben Affleck
This guy Mark I went to high school with who now owns every chic bar in Paris
Jude Law
A$AP Rocky
Keith Richards
My cousin, Joseph
Bobby Cannavale
Dominic Cooper
Eminem
Keira Knightly