The Valentine’s Day Massacre

I don’t want to get into the details of my whole “love” situation currently, but just know that I’m fucking hating today more than you could possibly imagine. I mean, I get it. This day is awful for a lot of us, with it’s constant reminders that we are fat, ugly and un-girlfriendable.

But I’ve decided to repurpose this day and celebrate the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre: Basically, in 1929 a bunch of gangsters in Chicago dressed up like cops and then shot another group of rival gangsters, execution style. Seven people died. It was gruesome. It was horrible. Blood was everywhere. But to me, celebrating that seems more appealing that celebrating roses, chocolate, and pink.

If you are in love today, good for you. But maybe next year will be really sad for you. You never know. I’m just being honest. I’m sure you’ll be fine though.

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