Ask Babe: Leo Date?

Babe,

Can’t breathe! Lana, Florence, Prada inspired costumes wearing Carey Mulligan…LEO! Pre-game before, I’ll bring the kush and xanies. What time should I pick you up?

S********

 

Claire Danes,

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

It’s so early, it’s so Monday, and you’re screaming. I mean, I get that my boyfriend is the title character of this movie and I get that I’ll be seeing it several times, alone, but seriously calm down. Did you see Baz’s last movie, Australia? Because, really.

I’m sure the Miuccia-designed wardrobe will send me into a spinning state of exstasy and exhaustion and I’ll probably blackout if Leo slaps or punches anyone (this is one of my blackout triggers, always has been). But, I have a foreboding suspicion that this movie is gonna suck. I’ve actually asked my shaman, Steve, to pray for it. Steve’s been way off his game lately though. He’s also Reese Witherspoon’s shaman and we all know how she’s doing at the moment.

Let’s hope that The Great Gatsby is as good as it looks and not as bad as it definitely will be.

LOVE YOU. MEAN IT.
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