Why I’m Not Moving To Sweden

Masturbation is legal on public beaches in Stockholm.

Now, American sexhibitionists are relocating to Sweden, a country that is paler, less clothed, and apparently more willing to allow 65 year old men to ejaculate into the sea than the United States.

Although I’m all about living on the sexual cutting edge, I just prefer to see a flaccid penis at the beach. Sooooo, while this new law may work well for sexually unrepressed Swedes, I’ll probably opt for the clothing optional waters of the French Riviera instead this coming summer.

Sweden is chic, but France is chicer.

LOVE YOU. MEAN IT.
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