Ask Babe: Can I Fuck Your Intern?

Dear Babe,

Can I fuck David the intern? Is he on howaboutwe? Are you really letting him invade your sacred blog? What is up with his chakra? Did he really mispronounce Givenchy? Does he have a last name/life?

P.S: RIP L’Wren Scott

Love, H*****

 

Dear Assistant Star Fucker,

Hey, what’s up dude? First of all, back the fuck off. “Burrito Boy” posted that article like 5 minutes ago and you’re already trying to fuck him. Secondly, you have no idea what he looks like, if he’s into you, or what I think of him. Thirdly, please stop trying to fuck my intern. It’s not chic and you are coming across really desperate.

You will get to know him in due time. Susan is making me let him do this. You will come realize exactly who he is and why he is. Just be patient and chill the fuck out. 

LOVE YOU. MEAN IT.
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