Ask Babe: Kim?

July 3, 2012

Dear Babe,

Who is Kim Kardashian?

Love,

M*** K****

 

Dear Kris Humphries,

I’m so glad you asked this question because I don’t think there is one among us who hasn’t had that exact same thought.

According to the internets/pundits, KK is a socialite, television personality, model, actress, porn star and businesswoman. But to me, she is a scared little girl who just wants people to look at her and love her. Maybe it’s because her mom is a money obsessed slore who has profited on the sluttiness of her children. Or perhaps it’s because her dad used to do blow with O.J. Simpson before murdering people.

I have a feeling we won’t find the truth until Kanye writes a tell-all memoir that details some of Kim’s deepest and darkest. Until then I guess she’s just an Armenian-American who digs black cock.

LOVE YOU. MEAN IT.
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  • Jasmine Alvarez

    ha

  • Guest

    Have I told you lately… that I love you? Because its true.  I do.

  • H.

    Hahahahaha! Babe, you’re amazing!

  • http://asweetcupofcoffee.blogspot.co.uk/ Nabzz

    Probably my all-time favourite “ask Babe”. Spot on! SO MUCH LOVE FOR THIS. Hahah!

  • http://twitter.com/NOPeteHere 21 Jump Pete ™ ®

    I love this.  It’s what I say daily yet people keep following her.  And she only exists on Twitter.  Biggest insecure bitch ever.  She makes Heidi Montag look normal.  

    Now if only the other attention hogs Nicki Minaj and Rihanna would stop

    • Anonymous

       Except Nicki Minaj and Rihanna actually, you know, have talent.  KK, OTOH, has no discernible talent.  Of any kind.

  • KELLS

    LOL @ SLORE! Genius. I doubt she’ll let even Kanye know her deep, dark secrets.

  • Laurel

    Thanks for finally clearing this up, Babe. Kim Kardashian doesn’t even go here.

  • Samantha

    American in China reading this – thanks for the laugh!!!  :D 

  • Guest

    Mila Kunis totally asked this question…

  • ash

    This is my favorite Babe post ever!

  • http://www.facebook.com/MGlinesAtelier Archduke Morgan Bunny Glines

    I can’t believe you forgot to mention that she almost always looks fat. I mean, she’s not fat, but the way she’s always poured into her clothes makes her look like a voluptuous Herve Leger haggis.  

  • ney ney

    i wish people would stop referring to this chick as Armenian. She is HALF Armenian!!! Her slore of a mother is a combination of Swedish, German, Irish and something else. And Kim looks like her mother, not her Armenian father. I’m half Italian with an Italian last name, but I have other nationalities mixed in there too, so I don’t walk around claiming I’m Italian as if that 50% of me defines who I am. Armenians should be embarrassed by this bitch.

  • vivalanikki

    haha so on point.

  • McFeces

    I can totally see Kanye writing a tell-all memoir within the next 5 years.