Facing a Heat Wave

It’s the hottest part of the year for those of us in the Northern Hemisphere.  Pretty much every major American city (and by that I mean LA, NY, and Paris) is suffering through some sort of heatwave right now. So if you’re dealing with one hundred degree plus weather or 98% humidity, you might be concerned about your makeup situation.  I understand, which is why I’m sharing my recipe for perfect summer skin.

 Facial

This will take care of any discoloration, dryness, oiliness, wrinkles, or pores that you hopefully didn’t even have in the first place.  Now you can safely walk about foundation free.  If you want to be extra safe, get your teeth whitened.  They will reflect the harsh sun back onto your face in a much more flattering light.

SPF

As much as physically possible.  As I have discussed at length, tanning is for the morally and physically weak.  Further minimize your chance of sun damage by staying inside.  It’s fucking hot.

Chubby Stick

Optional.

If you follow these tips you should be able to suffer through the next few weeks of unbearable heat looking suitable for appearances at fashion shows, shopping, juiceries, et. al.

LOVE YOU. MEAN IT.
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