I’m so hungover. What do you recommend to cure the dreaded “next day” feeling?
Dear Courtney Cox’s assistant,
Whenever I’m hungover (either emotionally or physically), I procure 10 bottles of alkalized water, turn my dry sauna up to the “death valley” setting, drink two bottles, and finish the remaining eight bottles while meditating in 200 degrees of darkness and peace. For safety purposes (and because I love feeling loved) I make sure to have someone on hand to ask me if I’m all right every 15 minutes. Once I’ve replaced all the fluids in my body , I get out, wrap myself in seaweed, make the following smoothie, and fall asleep until tomorrow.
Hangover Sunset Smoothie
1 teaspoon wasabi powder
2 cups purple kale
3 cup alkalized kale water
Lemon zest, to taste
1 pinch of Cocaine (optional)
To make the kale water, boil 2 bunches of organic kale for 20 minutes on high heat, until the internal fibers begin to break down. Discard the kale, and allow the water to cool to room temperature. Transfer to your nearest Vitamix, add the fresh kale, wasabi powder and puree to your desired consistency. Season with zest and coke to taste.
If this doesn’t cure you, seek professional help.