Category Archives: Actresses
An Open Letter To Carrie Bradshaw
Care Bear (Jk), You are saving the world one pubic lice at a time, so thanks, I guess. And sorry, everyone, that you just had to read the word ‘lice.’ Twice. I never really liked you, Carrie. But according to … Continue reading
An Open Letter To Kim Kardashian’s Ankles
Dear Kardankles, Congrats on making it through the pregnancy. You’re probably really angry that the intense weight gain/media scrutiny/bad shoe choices, resulted in a super thin baby. You’re also probably wondering whether or not you’re ever going to look like … Continue reading
Ask Babe: My Boyfriend Is A Dick
Babe, My boyfriend treats me like shit. I cry all the time. My mom says I am giving myself to Walmart while my Barneys is waiting. What should I do? A*** Dear Rihanna, Some general thoughts on the subject of … Continue reading
My Boyfriend: Tui Mitcham
Tui Mitcham, the crux character of my fave rape-crime-poor people-drama, Top Of The Lake, is a twelve year old girl who lives in New Zealand, so she can’t exactly be my real boyfriend. But, there’s something super boyfriendy about her. … Continue reading